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My parents (written 30.12.03)
today it is official
my parents do not know
have no idea how I'm feeling
not even that I'm low
been 3/4 days since I selfharmed
they do not have a clue
they don't want to see me bad
I'm "happy" all day through
mum and friend been talking
think im completely better
cuts on my arms prove I'm not
whatever she thinks i'll let her
i cannot talk to my mum
i do not know why
i think she's too emotional
scared she's going to cry
enoguh stress already
she carries on her back
don't want to add anymore
as soon enough she'll crack
I do not see a future
just a tunnel long and black
all I want is to give up
give life the sack
yet I cannot do this
people drive me on and on
my burden just gets heavier
weighing down a ton
i cannot go forever
this they will find out
i'll either get better or
i'll give up the fight no doubt
mandy shanks (16)
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